The Mentoring Manifesto, Vol. 40: Your Mentees Need Your Marriage Story

Recently, Susan and I snuck away for a few days to celebrate twenty-one years of marriage. We were married at twenty-five…surrounded by family and friends…and utterly clueless about how hard the journey would be.

Two decades later and we’ve been through a lot…honeymoon, apartment living, Regi’s mentoring group, new job, lose job, first house, first dog, new job, lose job, in debt, out of debt, Thomas, extensive travel, Bo, more travel, counseling, depression, redemption, healing, Radical Mentoring, teenage years…you get the picture. For richer or poorer, in sickness and health, to love and cherish, until death do us part.

In his book, Sacred Marriage, Gary Thomas compares romantic love and mature love. He writes, “Romantic love has no elasticity to it. It can never be stretched; it simply shatters. Mature love, the kind demanded of a good marriage, must stretch…This is the reality of human heart, the inevitability of two sinful people pledging to live together, with all their faults, for the rest of their lives.”

Many of your mentees will be stepping into a new season of marriage or parenting. As the mentor, your story, especially the ups and downs of marriage and work-life balance, needs to be told. Your experience provides them with needed perspective and insight into what is to come. The resources below will help guide you in some of these conversations and help deepen your convictions on godly marriage.

One last word of wisdom, maybe for you, or maybe for those you mentor…find something you love to do together. A year ago, Susan and I went fly fishing together and loved it. On this anniversary, we spent time outside on the water, soaking in God’s goodness and an incredible twenty-one years together!

COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS AND ENCOURAGE ONE ANOTHER

Honesty is vital to a marriage, but you can’t confuse negativity with honesty. In this video, pastor and author Paul David Tripp talks about the importance of encouraging your spouse, counting your blessings, and remaining thankful in light of disappointing realities.

Watch the video here.

THE DEATH OF PORN

Just about every man would admit to struggling with porn in some shape or form. It is one of the greatest tools of the enemy to destroy men, marriages, and families. Pastor Ray Ortlund joins the Dad Tired to talk about what the death of porn can look like…either for you or for the men you mentor.

Listen to the episode here.

DO YOU KNOW WHERE HER HEART IS?

How can a husband love his wife “as Christ loved the church” and not know where her heart is or what she really desires? In this post, RM founder Regi Campbell helps us unpack this question and why it’s crucial that every married man be able to answer it. Today. Right now.

Read the post here.

RADICAL WISDOM: A 7-DAY JOURNEY FOR HUSBANDS

No matter where your marriage is right now, it can always be better. This reading plan combines principles and wisdom from Scripture with the experience of a seasoned husband who’s learned from his mistakes. It makes a great add-on when your group talks about marriage. 

Start reading on YouVersion here.