As a culture, we’re killing the idea of suffering now for the good stuff later. We want the new car and the newest, coolest stuff, but we don’t want to save for them. We want them now. The result? Car loans, credit card payments, and oppressive debt.
We want happiness, and we want it now. The idea of waiting for your mate to mature seems ridiculous. What if she doesn’t? What if she stays the spoiled “Daddy’s girl” until she dies? What if she never changes her attitude about sex? Are you ready to wait around till the kids leave home, so maybe she’ll become your lover again?
And she’s probably got the same questions about you. Will he ever grow up? Will his relentless pursuit of getting in my pants ever subside? Will he ever care as much about me as he does about his job? Will I ever get as much attention as the TV? Or the ballgame? Will there ever be a time when he’ll hang out with me as much as he plays golf? Will he ever learn to listen to me? Value what I value? Truly be my friend?
The answer is yes. It can happen. All of this is possible.
But it won’t be overnight. It will take time, effort, and a lot of patience. It’s a long-term deal.
Right now is not all there is.
“Live for today, for tomorrow never comes” is a lie.
Tomorrow will come. You will get older. Your wife will change. You will qualify for Social Security, unless the grim reaper snags you early.
Impatience is what gets a marriage in trouble. You want what you want, and you want it now. Same with your wife. Little by little, one of you loses hope that things will change and the result is a mess of a marriage that hangs by a thread.
I want to challenge you to take a minute and think long-term. Really think.
Scripture: Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. (1 Corinthians 13:4-8)
Mentor Tip: Most of your guys will have some marriage issues. Regardless of their issues, help them think long-term. It takes time and effort to improve a marriage . . . but it starts with intentionality. Point them in the right direction and encourage them.