Mentoring Works: The Proof of the Pudding
The proof of the pudding . . . is in the eating. If you’ve read this blog for any length of time, you know I’m all about mentoring. Men’s small group mentoring to be exact. Last September, my church (North Point Community Church) launched a beta test of small group mentoring as a way to develop lay leaders, primarily sharpening on men’s groups. Yesterday, a number of the mentors gathered at my house to talk about what happened in our first season together. Nine groups of 6-8 men, each with a mentor and co-mentor, growing together in community for nine months. A few highlights from the end-of-year survey . . .
- Because of the mentoring group experience, my walk with God has “Improved Significantly” – 76% “Improved” – 24% “Improved or Significantly Improved” – 100%
- Overall, if I were to rate my relationships with the other men in my mentoring group, I would say we “opened up to each other” – 100%. Our relationships are “Very Deep” – 41% “Deep” – 59%
- This group is helping me develop as a man in regards to one or more of the following: humility, curiosity, teach-ability, intentionality, and a closer relationship with the Lord. “Definitely” – 98% “Probably” – 2% “Definitely or Probably” – 100%
- As a result of the mentoring group process, I would say my life “Improved Significantly” – 55% “Improved” – 45% “Improved or Improved Significantly” – 100%
- I have experienced authentic community. “No” – 0% “Yes” – 100%
- I have another guy who I am intentionally tracking with whom I consider to be fully known by. “No” – 31% “Yes” – 69%
- My giving to the church and/or other Christian ministries – “Increased Significantly” – 8% “Increased” – 44% “Didn’t Change” – 48% “Increased or Increased Significantly” – 52%
- Because of my mentoring group experience, my marriage and family relationships have “Improved Significantly” – 35% “Improved” – 52% “Improved or Improved Significantly” – 87%
But if you really want to get a measure of life change in a man, ask his wife. We did that and it really provided the icing on the cake. A few of their comments . . .
“Jeff has grown much more confident in his faith. He has become such an amazing man of God that he inspires me to do the same. [The mentoring] group was such a beautiful gift to our family and I am so eternally grateful for it. This program benefited me just about as much as it did him. I have this WHOLE man now who is so very dedicated to me and to our family. I thoroughly enjoyed watching his growth and hope other wives will get this gift as well. Our marriage went from ordinary to extraordinary.”
“In the 27 years of our marriage, nothing has ministered to the level of anger my husband had. I had to ask him one day, “What has brought this ‘BIG CHANGE’?” His response was this mentoring group. I am not sure what it spoke to, but it hit the core of his being when it relates to the improvement I see in his anger towards me.”
“This program was amazing for my husband. He passed all the books he read on to me. He came home from meetings happy and took what he learned and truly used it. It has made his strong faith even stronger and our solid marriage even more solid. Can’t say enough good things about this program. Thank you North Point!”
Reading blog posts can be a spectator sport. Investing in a small group of guys to help them become fully alive in Jesus is anything but. If your church isn’t involved in men’s small group mentoring, try sending every pastor on staff a personal email with a link to this blog and radicalmentoring.com. And if you want to go a step further, you could even send them a copy of Mentor Like Jesus.
Question: Has your church had a similar experience as a result of small group mentoring? Tell us about it here.
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Responses (3)
Passion versus programs. I believe RM creates a life long passion for mentoring / discipling / coaching / shepherding, whatever one wants to call building stronger Jesus following foundations into men. Thank you. I use the word passion in place of “program.” My radar goes off whenever I hear of 6-9 month “programs” or initiatives. RM is a way of life not an “intensive” program where you get a momento to put on a bookshelf after completion. My caution regarding anyone using the program (short term mindset) is based off of experience seeing a church get turned (in a glorious way) upside down by the power of mentoring. The church burned white hot and internal growth was amazing. But when it started to get “risky”… talking to guys who are engaged in real life it cooled off significantly and as now resident in those few with the passion to love men closer to Jesus.
I so appreciate your blog and consider myself to be apart of your faithful / reliable men who are teaching others even though we’ve never met or spoken.
Thanks Spig. Sounds like you’re what I call a ‘lifer’. I’ll do RM groups as long as the Lord leaves me here on earth.
Amen – me too! We’ll high five in heaven as we praise God for his mercy to pick us to be on His reconciliation team. (2 Cor 5:17-20)