When most people think of mentoring, they picture two people sitting in a coffee shop, talking about whatever, one has grey hair, and the other is asking questions. At Radical Mentoring, we mentor in groups…one to two mentors, four to eight mentees. I could give you a lot of reasons why but that’s not the topic at hand today.
The reality is, while deep bonds of community form inside of Radical Mentoring groups, ultimately, all relationships are individual. You can’t have a relationship with a group…it’s one-on-one, both between mentor and mentee and between mentees. That’s why we do growth partners in between mentoring meetings, so the mentees can get to know each other on a personal, individual level.
It’s also why we highly encourage mentors to connect one-on-one with each mentee at some point during the mentoring season…the earlier, the better, ideally within a month or two after everyone tells their story on the Story Retreat. This is an important time for the mentor to dig deeper into the mentee’s story and background. And for the mentee to have a chance to ask questions he might not feel comfortable asking in the group setting.
Your mentees want to connect with you because they look up to you. So don’t hold back when it comes to one-on-ones, and definitely don’t put them off. They are too important. The resources below will give you some ideas and tips on making the most of these times.
How do you move the conversation with a mentee from the “kitchen table” environment of a mentoring meeting to the “back porch” environment of a one-on-one? Here are some helpful thoughts and ideas on how to approach this valuable time.
RM founder Regi Campbell breaks down the purpose of one-on-one mentee meetings and provides some coaching based on how he conducted his one-on-one meetings over the years. Most important…make sure they know you love them!
One huge part of one-on-one meetings is diving further into each mentee’s story. This helpful podcast episode from the Paterson Center features an interview with Dan Allender and explores how to unpack our stories better and appreciate their beauty and brokenness.
RM founder Regi Campbell always liked picked up his mentees from work before embarking on a one-on-one meeting. That practice provided insight into a mentee’s work habits but also into his faith walk. In this blog post, he explains why.
ACTIVATE THE MEN IN YOUR CHURCH
Small group mentoring can help you engage your men, build your core group of leaders, and transform your church. Our free resources equip you with all the tools you need to launch a sustainable mentoring program.