“I Ain’t Confessin’ Nuthin’”
Nowadays, we talk about transparency. But for centuries, it was called confession. It’s the idea of telling another Jesus-follower your failures and misdeeds. Confessing sin to one another was a huge part of the early church and perhaps a big part of its profound power and influence. Over the years, public confession was replaced by private confession . . . usually to a priest. He was ‘safe’ . . . faceless and anonymous. It’s usually easier to confess to a professional than to a regular person, especially a friend . . . someone you’ll see often and you fear may judge you for your failures. But Christian community was (and is) the best place for bringing our darkest ‘stuff’ into the light. Here’s a piece from Dietrich Bonhoeffer’s Life Together . . .
“In confession there takes place a breakthrough to community. Sin wants to be alone with people. It takes them away from the community. The more lonely people become, the more destructive the power of sin over them. The more deeply they become entangled in it, the more unholy is their loneliness. Sin wants to remain unknown. It shuns the light. In the darkness of what is left unsaid sin poisons the whole being of a person. This can happen in the midst of a pious community. In confession the light of the gospel breaks into the darkness and closed isolation of the heart. Sin must be brought into the light. What is unspoken is said openly and confessed. All that is secret and hidden comes to light. It is a hard struggle until the sin crosses one’s lips in confession. But God breaks down gates of bronze and cuts through bars of iron (Ps. 107:16) Since the confession of sin is made in the presence of another Christian, the last stronghold of self-justification is abandoned. The sinner surrenders, giving up all evil, giving the sinner’s heart to God and finding the forgiveness of all one’s sin in the community of Jesus Christ and other Christians. Sin that has been spoken and confessed has lost all of its power. It has been revealed and judged as sin. It can no longer tear apart the community.”
Confessing to God in private or to an anonymous person might make us feel better, but it doesn’t always help us do better. To quote John Lynch in The Cure . . .
“What if there was a place so safe that the worst of me could be known, and I would discover that I would not be loved less, but more in the telling of it?”
It’s counterintuitive but public confession . . . confession among Jesus-followers, yields respect, not shame. We connect with each other’s humanity but, more importantly, we connect in a common gratitude for His pervasive forgiveness and amazing grace.
If you don’t have a friend or a group who knows your dark corners . . . where you can confess that last 10% nobody knows about you and your heart, start asking God to connect you. Don’t stop looking until you find that ‘safe place’ . . . where trust is total and nothing is hidden.
Scripture: I am sending you to them, to open their eyes and turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan to God, so that they may receive forgiveness of sins and a place among those who are sanctified by faith in me. (Acts 26:17b-18)
Mentor Tip: Your job as a small group mentor is to create that ‘safe place’ in your group. That can only be done by being the first to confess . . . to tell your full story and hide nothing – past or present, from your guys.
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Responses (4)
Hi Regi, thank you for the powerful article. I am wondering how it would help my group telling about my sins before I became a Christian.
From the quote in the post ” Since the confession of sin is made in the presence of another Christian, the last stronghold of self-justification is abandoned.” Telling your group shows them your humility AND the power of God in both forgiving you for that stuff but more for lifting you up and out….so you don’t do that stuff or live like that through God’s grace and the power of the Holy Spirit living in you. You don’t tell your stuff so as to glorify the sin….only to glorify God. When we bring ourselves to confess, we’re saying “I trust you guys with my secrets”. They will think more of you than less
Thanks for sharing this Regi..
I am going to read this to my group on Wednesday.
Blessings
David
Regi:
I totally agree with you that confessing sins to one another brings healing as described in James 5:16 as we pray for one another. This can’t be done anonymously, and it can’t be done where real relationships have not been formed. So often I’ve been in meetings with other pastors where pastors will “out” people who have made confessions to them to the confessors demise. This happens often in churches. Past Confessed sins are used to bludgeon people into submission if confessions aren’t made on safe, equal ground. I love the book of James because it teaches about correcting sinful, selfish relationships before it teaches about confession. I hope that makes sense. Great article.