The Mentoring Manifesto, Vol. 55: Building the Friendships We All Need
Remember the story in Mark 2:1-5 where Jesus heals a paralytic? It’s a great example of friendship.
The four friends made the hard decision to befriend the paralytic man. This friendship probably cost them their time, social status, health, and more. Despite that, when Jesus came to town, they knew it might be the only chance their friend had to be healed, so they crashed through a stranger’s roof to get him to the feet of Jesus. And the man on the mat? He was vulnerable enough to let his friends into his suffering and accept their help.
This story leads us to two questions: 1) Are we willing to embrace the transparency required to bring our mats into full view? And 2) are we willing to be the kind of friends who will drop everything, pick up our friend’s mats, and crash a roof to get them to Jesus?
If we want to create true community, some key ingredients must be present: weakness, acceptance, forgiveness, vulnerability, and trust. We must let go of image management and let people get to know the real us. And we must slow our lives down enough to look up and see opportunities to serve those around us. Often, someone just has to be willing to go first.
Mentors, tell your mentees about the times you picked up your friends’ mats and when you wish you had somebody there to pick up your mat. And most importantly, encourage them to be the kind of friends who pick up each other’s mats. The resources below will help you and your mentees embark on this journey.
THE CURRENCY OF REAL FRIENDSHIP IS NEED
In this article, RM founder Regi Campbell explains why you will never have a deep friendship without expressing your needs. To have a friend, you have to take the risk of opening yourself up and sharing your heart, meaning you have to risk being rejected.
COMMUNITY: WHY MOST MEN NEED IT, SOME HATE IT & FEW FIND IT
On this episode of the Dad Tired podcast, author Justin Camp talks about community and why it’s so rare. He explains why the myth persists that “real” men don’t need each other and shares practical wisdom for starting worthwhile spiritual communities.
FIND YOUR PEOPLE: A 5-DAY READING PLAN FOR CREATING TRUE COMMUNITY
Is it possible to find deep friendships in a disconnected world? Yes. This reading plan shows us that even when we feel alone, God designed us to be in relationships. In a world that seems more divided than ever, we need each other. And even in our brokenness, it’s possible to thrive, together.
Start reading on YouVersion here.
MENTOR TRAINING VIDEO ON COMMUNITY
“Nobody ever gets fixed, but we only mature in community.” In this video, longtime Radical Mentor Pete Loescher reminds us why living and growing community is so critical and how we as mentors can help our mentees prioritize community.
Breathe New Life Into Your Men's Ministry
Small group mentoring can help you engage your men, build your core group of leaders, and transform your church. Our free resources equip you with all the tools you need to launch a sustainable mentoring program.