The Mentoring Manifesto, Vol. 75: How Our Identity Affects Our Thoughts

I came across the following scenario in James Clear’s book Atomic Habits. Say you’re a smoker but desperately want to break the habit. You’re standing outside, and someone offers you a cigarette. How do you respond?

Do you say, “No, thanks, I’m trying to quit.”

Or do you respond, “No, thanks, I’m not a smoker.”

Clear concludes that the first response comes from a person who believes they’re still a smoker trying to become someone else, while the second response comes from someone with a core belief that smoking is something they did in the past.

Which of these two people is more likely to quit smoking successfully?

The point is that our identity, who we really believe we are, directly affects our thoughts and actions.

So, if I identify as a follower of Jesus, do my thoughts and actions reflect that? Do I live in a way that reflects my belief that I am loved unconditionally by the One who created me? Really? And if not, where’s the disconnect?

As a mentor, one of the best things you can help your mentees do is identify the negative things they think repeatedly about themselves and others. Help them unpack their thought lives and take steps to renew their minds. Point them to what God says about them and encourage them to replace their negative thoughts with grateful ones.

The resources below should help you and your mentees shape your thought lives to better reflect who God says you are and all He has for you.

SOUND MIND | CHURCH OF THE CITY SERMON

In this sermon on Romans 8:5-8, pastor Darrin Whitehead from Church of the City helps us understand the importance of setting our minds on Jesus and governing our thoughts. He also unpacks how developing a “sound mind” shapes our character and identity.

Watch the video here.

THE 5 DESTRUCTIVE CONVERSATIONS IN YOUR HEAD (AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT THEM

As a leader, there’s a conversation going on in your head all the time, and too often it’s full of negative self-talk. In this article, author Carey Nieuwhof unpacks five destructive things we tell ourselves, where they come from, and how to combat them.

Read the whole article here.

WINNING THE WAR IN YOUR MIND BIBLE READING PLAN

Most of life’s battles are won or lost in the mind. In this 7-day Bible reading plan from pastor Craig Groeschel, you’ll discover how to fight toxic thoughts, overcome out-of-control thinking, and start winning the war in our minds using God’s truth as your battle plan.

Start reading on YouVersion here.

“I’M AN IDIOT!”

Have you ever called yourself an idiot? In this blog post, RM founder Regi Campbell reminds us that’s just not who we are. He then challenges us to avoid attaching that kind of identity to ourselves and instead be kind to ourselves and always remember who our Father says we are…even when we mess up.

Read the blog post here.