The Mentoring Manifesto, Vol. 74: Don’t Assume, Embrace Empathy

A few years ago, listening to a podcast, I heard a term that resonated deeply with me…assumicide. The speaker defines it as “the way we murder other people in our hearts by the false assumptions we make about them.”

Think about it…if you have more, you assume people with less are lazy or not as well educated as you. If you have less, you assume people with more were born with a silver spoon and haven’t worked a day in their lives.

As the world grows more digital and less conversational, the temptation to make character assumptions is rampant, tearing apart our families and communities. We too often assume the worst about people, compare ourselves to others, and jump to the conclusion that we have someone all figured out.

But as expected, Jesus shoots it pretty straight, “Do not judge or you too will be judged.”

Assumptions limit our viewpoint and keep us from walking a mile in someone else’s shoes. So, don’t assume. It’s a cancer to the authentic community we all want to build.

Reggie Joiner says, “Empathy is the ability to press pause on your own thoughts and feelings long enough to understand someone else’s.” So instead of assuming, let’s embrace empathy and transparency. Let’s focus on being better listeners and becoming great question-askers. The resources below will help you and your mentees combat the sin of assuming.

THE STUNNING EMPATHY OF CHRIST JESUS 

Empathy means temporarily laying aside the drive to “be right” and instead focusing on another person’s thoughts, history, convictions, and feelings. To be Christ-like is to be empathetic. If Jesus could do it for even His enemies, then we can do it too in our pursuit of Him.

Read the article here.

THE ART OF LISTENING

Listening is more than the act of hearing. It’s creating an environment in which the other person feels heard. If we truly listen to someone else’s perspective, we can gain understanding and engage in more meaningful dialogue. In this video, Simon Sinek offers insights on how to be a truly great listener. 

Watch the video here.

RADICAL EMPATHY AND THE SECOND QUESTION

In this blog post, Regi Campbell explains how to embrace empathy by pausing, actually listening to people, and connecting with what they’re saying and feeling. When we take time to care by engaging with their lives, they feel loved, and the relationship strengthens. 

Check out the whole post here.

JUDGE NOT: 3-DAY READING PLAN

Who are you judging? Who are you looking down upon? This reading plan from Vance K. Jackson helps you consider what you’re sowing into others. Are you sowing discord, confusion, destruction, or division? Or are you choosing to deliberately sow and show the love of Jesus?

Start reading on YouVersion here.